Chapter 4

The next evening, just as I was about to go to bed, my mom came in carrying a bowl of herbal medicine.

"This is gender-changing medicine."

She said.

" I had someone get it from back home—it wasn’t cheap. They said if you drink this, even a daughter can turn into a son"

I looked at the bowl, feeling somewhat powerless.

"Mom, have you lost your mind?"

"You're the one who's lost your mind!"

Her voice turned shrill.

"I'm doing this for your own good, spent so much money to get this, and you're still ungrateful?"

Lucas, who had just finished showering and emerged from the bathroom, took the bowl and sniffed it.

His expression changed.

Changed drastically.

"Mom."

His voice was tight.

"Who gave you this medicine?"

Lucas slammed the bowl down on the table heavily, anger compressed in his voice.

"This is full of abortion drugs! If you drink this, forget changing gender—both mother and child won't survive!"

My mom froze.

"That's impossible."

She shook her head.

"They said it was a traditional family recipe..."

"I'm a doctor!"

Lucas cut her off.

"It's all abortion medication! Are you trying to kill Aria?"

"So what if it aborts? It aborts, that's all."

My mom spoke matter-of-factly, chin raised.

"It's just a girl anyway. What's so precious about her?

When she grows up, she'll belong to someone else's family.

Get rid of it now, have another one later."

My whole body trembled.

"Mom."

My voice shook.

"What you just said—are you serious?"

"When have I ever joked with you?"

She took a step forward.

"Aria, don't be foolish.

I've been through this, I know the suffering of not having a son.

Your father back then..."

"Don't mention Dad!"

I yelled at her for the first time.

"The suffering you endured your whole life was because you married someone like Dad!

He hit you, cursed you, treated you like a work animal.

You don't hate him—instead you learned his ways, and now you want to use them on me?"

My mom froze.

"You think I didn't see?"

My eyes burned.

"When I was little and he got drunk and hit you, you hid in the kitchen crying.

The next day you still served him tea and water.

I asked you why you didn't leave.

You said women have to accept their fate. But now?

You want me to accept this fate too?"

"I'm doing this for your own good!"

"For my own good?"

I pointed at the bowl of medicine.

"That's abortion medication, and you brought it for me to drink—that's for my own good?"

"So what!"

Her voice turned shrill.

"It's just a girl in your belly! What good is a girl?

Have I denied you food or clothes since you were small?

But once you got married you sided with outsiders, talking back to your own mother—this is the punishment for raising a daughter!"

I looked at her and suddenly laughed.

"Mom, I'll never become like you in this lifetime. My daughter won't either."