Chapter 4

I walked home like a ghost, clutching the lab report.

Pushing open the door, Julian was sitting on the sofa, reading.

Seeing me, he immediately put down his book and came over.

"Darling, you're back! Was the training tiring? You don't look so good." He reached out to embrace me.

I took a step back, avoiding him.

His smile froze for a moment; he looked at me, confused.

"What's wrong?"

I didn't speak. I just walked up to him and threw the printed lab report onto the coffee table in front of him.

"Julian, explain this to me. What is this?"

He picked up the paper. The moment his eyes landed on the words "Spironolactone," his face instantly turned ashen.

His hands began to tremble, his lips quivered, unable to utter a single word.

The shock and panic on his face didn't seem feigned. This made me even more confused.

If this was his meticulously planned conspiracy, he shouldn't be so distraught.

"You... how did you find this out?" He finally found his voice, but it was filled with terror.

"Don't worry about how I found out," my voice was as cold as ice. "You just need to tell me why. Why were you feeding me this? For three years of marriage, you've been feeding me sterilizing drugs every day. Why?"

I expected him to argue, to deny it.

But he didn't.

He looked at me, his eyes filling with pain and despair, and then, he did something I never would have expected.

He dropped to his knees in front of me with a thud.

A man over six feet tall, kneeling on the floor without an ounce of dignity, clutching my pants leg, sobbing uncontrollably.

"Darling, I'm so sorry, I failed you..." He cried hysterically, like a guilty child.

I was stunned by his sudden action.

What was this? Repentance?

"Get up! Don't put on an act here!" I angrily tried to shake him off, but he held on tight.

"I won't get up! Darling, please listen to me, it's not what you think!" He looked up, his face tear-streaked. "I did all this for your own good!"

"For my good?" I let out a bitter laugh. "You fed me sterilizing drugs and claim it was for my good? Julian, do you take me for a fool?"

"It's true!" He wailed. "Darling, I... I have a disease, a family genetic condition!"

My heart suddenly skipped a beat.

A genetic condition?

"The men in my family, none of them live past forty. It's a rare neurodegenerative disease. When it flares up, you become completely paralyzed, lose all sensation, and eventually die in agony. My father had it, and my grandfather had it too..."

He choked, almost unable to continue.

"I love you, I love you so much, Scarlett. I couldn't let you bear the pain of giving birth to a child, only to watch them suffer the same fate as me. I also couldn't bear for you to lose your husband in middle age and struggle to live alone with a sick child."

"So, I could only use this method. I didn't want you to get pregnant, I didn't want us to have children. I fed you the medication because I wanted you to never experience the agony of seeing a child suffer."

His voice was filled with sorrow and helplessness, every word like a knife piercing my heart.

He sounded so sincere, so heartbroken, I almost believed him.

"Then why didn't you tell me sooner?" I demanded, though my voice softened.

"How could I say it?" He gave a self-deprecating laugh, tears flowing even harder. "Tell you I'm a dying man? Tell you our marriage was doomed to be a tragedy from the start? I couldn't! I was afraid you'd leave me. I was selfish, I wanted you by my side, even if only for a few short years."

He got up from the floor, took a medical record file from his study drawer, and handed it to me.

"This is my medical record, and my father's and grandfather's death certificates. I didn't lie to you."

My hands trembled as I took the file.

Opening it, I saw a series of complex medical reports and diagnostic papers.

The diagnosis section clearly read: Hereditary Sensorimotor Neuropathy.

Attached were his father's and grandfather's medical records, with the same disease listed as the cause of death.

My legs gave out, and I collapsed onto the couch.

So, all of this wasn't betrayal, but a man's deep and twisted love? To spare me future pain, he chose this method, preemptively robbing me of my right to be a mother?

I didn't know whether to cry or laugh.

"Darling, I'm so sorry..." Julian knelt before me, carefully taking my hand. "I know I was wrong, terribly wrong. I should have told you everything sooner. But I truly just didn't want you to suffer. Hit me, curse me, do anything you want, just don't leave me, please?"

My mind was a tangled mess. Hatred was replaced by an overwhelming sense of grief and absurdity.

If what he said was true, how was I supposed to face him? This man who used the cruelest method to "protect" me.

I looked at his tear-reddened eyes, at his face full of pleading and remorse.

I pulled my hand away and stood up.

"Julian, I need to be alone."

I locked myself in the room.

I slid down the door to the floor, clutching the "medical record."

My mind was blank.

Should I believe him?