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True Health Report

Not My Kid, Not My Problem

Chapter 2

3,611 words

Whitney sounded impatient.

"I'm out of town for work. I was in a rush just now and accidentally locked Leo out."

"I'm catching my train and can't turn around, so you'll have to take care of Leo for me."

She paused, her tone suddenly turning smug and patronizing.

"Don't say I never look out for my neighbors. I've caught you staring at Leo plenty of times."

"I know you've always wanted a son. Lucky for you, I'm giving you the chance to have one. From now on, Leo is your son, and you're his dad."

Her shameless logic almost made me burst out laughing from sheer outrage.

Before I could get a word in, she was already rattling off her list of demands.

"Leo has a bad temper, so you need to cater to him. Every morning, he drinks only organic whole milk. The only fruit he eats is imported Chilean cherries and premium Shine Muscat grapes."

"If he wants to watch TV, do not stop him. And you better read him three books at bedtime. Every single night!"

"While my boy stays with you this month, don't you dare let him suffer one bit, or I'll hold you personally responsible when I get back!"

I listened to her rattle off one absurd demand after another.

"Whitney, have you lost your damn mind? When did I ever agree to be Leo's father?"

I cut her off sharply.

There was a stunned silence on the other end, as if she hadn't expected this reaction at all.

"What do you mean? Sean, I'm doing you a huge favor letting you take care of my son! What is with your attitude?"

"My entire family and I are out of town on vacation. We aren't home."

"If you dumped your son outside my door, you have no idea where he is right now."

"Turn around and get him now. If anything happens to him, it's on you."

"Furthermore, I am not that child's father. You are committing child abandonment and making false accusations. I've already filed a report with the police, and I'm more than happy to take a paternity test."

Whitney erupted into a scornful laugh over the phone.

"Sean, who do you think you're fooling?"

"You think I don't know what you're doing? You're making up lies just to trick me into coming back!"

"Let me tell you, don't look a gift horse in the mouth. This is your golden ticket to get a son without doing any work. Other people beg me for this chance!"

"A paternity test? Who are you trying to intimidate? The kid is at your place, so you're his dad!"

Disgusted, I scoffed under my breath.

"I'm telling you, we aren't home. Believe me or don't."

With that, I hung up.

I saved the recording.

Then I saved our airport selfies and took screenshots of our boarding passes and month-long itinerary.

I texted Whitney one clear message:

"My family is away for a month. I called the police because you left Leo outside my door. Please call them back and tell them where you are. I am not Leo's father, and I'll take a paternity test if I have to."

Before we boarded, an officer called me back. No one had answered the door at either apartment. I sent him the clip of Martha taking Leo and gave him Whitney's number.

Our vacation should have been relaxing, but Whitney's messages flooded my phone every day.

Completely ignoring my warnings, she grew bolder and more demanding by the day.

"Sean, I saw on Instagram that other kids are eating imported king crab. You better get some for Leo today!"

"I'm warning you, if Leo loses even a single pound, I'll tear your life apart when I get back!"

"Did you send the child support yet? If you don't transfer it, I'll take you to court for child neglect!"

"Quit ignoring my texts! I know your type. You probably have my son hidden in there and want to keep him all to yourself!"