He Sent Me Her Moans

On our wedding anniversary, I put on sexy lingerie and nervously sent my sexually indifferent husband a selfie.

Our chat history was nothing but 1s and 2s.

Me: "Working late tonight?"

Him: "1" — meaning yes.

Me: "Coming home tonight?"

Him: "2" — meaning no.

This time, instead of a number, he sent a 60-second voice message.

I played it. A woman's moans came through:

"Wait until I finish having sex with Professor Moore, then I'll send him back."

"You take care of his daily needs. I'll take care of his physical needs. Nice and clear division of labor."